CW: suicide loss, faith, existential grief Before my dad died, I had a worldview. We all do. I didn't actually think of it as a worldview — I just thought of it as reality. The way things were. The assumptions that ran underneath everything like the operating system of my life. And then he died by suicide, and the operating system crashed. This is one of the most jarring aspects of losing a loved one to suicide. It's as if what you believed before is in jagged little pieces,